Dating Women and Dating Games, Part 08
My epic journey of dating women and dating games continues in this “tale of two people from two cities”: me in Perth; “Lucinda” in Sydney. Opposite sides of the great Australian island-continent.
Catch up if you missed the previous installment: http://blogs.davelozinski.com/datingandrelationships/dating-games-part-07
Lucinda and I went through the typical motions: we met, found ourselves emailing each other daily, phoning regularly, and even playing games such as Scrabble and Chess together online despite the great divide that ended up between us.
Then the Easter holidays were rapidly approaching. Since Australia has public holidays for both Good Friday and Easter Monday, I suggested we get together to make the most of the time off.
After three months, this is where this dramatic saga begins…
Lucinda had mentioned that with some that with some of the current stress she was facing, she needed, and wanted, to get away. So naturally I suggested she could come to Perth.
Within a few days she decided it would be too expensive to make the trip to Perth, and asked about me going to Sydney for the 4-day weekend.
I said sure, and asked if it would be ok if I stayed in her spare bedroom. She said she would feel uncomfortable with having me stay in her spare room, suggesting that I might be able to stay at her parents’ place since they weren’t there, but her cousin from Perth was.
Within a day she reneged on that idea, and suggested meeting somewhere in the middle where we both haven’t been.
Alice Springs immediately came to mind. I researched flights and hotel costs. I was even set to book a flight that would leave one day after she did just to make sure she made it out of Alice Springs ok.
Within 2 days she said the costs were prohibitive. (Hmmm… noticing a pattern yet? Shoot me now for trying again!)
Back to square one.
Since everything seemed to be revolving around money issues for her, I proposed that she come to Perth, forking out half the money for the plane ticket. I’d give her half of that amount immediately, and then the other half when she arrived. After all, what’s the difference if I would have had to pay to fly to her?
Also as part of the bargain, I suggested she stay with her relatives in Perth, and we could just catch up. This way, if things didn’t work out, she could go spend more time visiting with them for the holiday. No harm done.
Lucinda accepted this proposal.
1 week before her coming over to visit, she cancelled as there was just too much going on in her life.
She promptly refunded my money, but we continued to correspond.
I should have learned, but…
After another couple of weeks in May, I decided I was going to surprise her. I used some frequent fly points and booked a round-trip ticket to Sydney to arrive late one Friday night, departing Sunday.
Not 48 hours after I booked those tickets she called me explaining she felt like I wasn’t doing anything to “advance the relationship”.
WHAT??! Bitch slap #1
Totally confused, I asked her to explain why she felt that way given:
- I was the one who suggested we catch up
- tried all sorts of compromising to visit with her over the long holiday weekend (Sydney, Perth, Alice Springs, etc)
- she’s the one that cancelled. Cancelled. CANCELLED.
That left her speechless (I love hitting people who deserve a bitch-slap with logic they can’t refute). Not wanting to give away the surprise tickets I just booked, I asked her to gather her thoughts, and we’d talk about it that Friday. That is, I made a “phone date” with her that Friday night about an hour after my plane was due to land.
I took a taxi to her place.
Who’s the one not “advancing” the relationship?
Lucinda had no idea that when I called her Friday night I was standing right outside her apartment building with the chocolate Easter bunny I bought for her when she was supposed to come over to Perth.
She was caught totally off guard when I told her to come outside because I was there. It took some coaxing because she didn’t believe me!
Needless to say, we had a great weekend together, and looked forward to catching up again.
June had another long holiday weekend. I told her if she wanted to come to Perth for it, my previous offer of paying half the ticket still stood.
So she used the credit she had from her previous cancelled flight to pay for the flight to Perth.
About a week before she was due to arrive, she said she was having “second thoughts” because she felt like I wasn’t serious, especially since I hadn’t yet entered into a committed relationship with her.
I had enough of her game playing.
Bitch Slap #2
I told her my actions to date have certainly shown I’m serious and that I felt like she should change careers to become a sky-diver.
“Because you’re already an expert at bailing out before a plane takes off.”
Knowing she wouldn’t appreciate that, I questioned her without pause: “why would I want to commit to a woman who herself can’t even commit to visitation plans?”
After hashing that out, I asked if another weekend would be more suited for her. She said she already checked, and couldn’t cancel this flight without losing the entire fare (the airline only allows so many reschedules).
I told her I really would love to see her, and to give me a call if she wanted me to pick her up from the airport.
The weekend came and went with no word from her.
Who knows if she still came to Perth that weekend.
I am so looking forward to the day I meet the woman who will become my wife.
The scene that plays after the credits scroll by…
Lucinda relocated to Perth from Sydney a few months afterwards when she did come over to visit a relative (and not me) and loved the city’s lifestyle.
How do I know this?
I went back to some online dating sites after this ordeal, and saw her dating profile, listed in Perth.